new shoes.

i'm really frustrated today.
last night was weird.
this morning sucked.
i'm expecting nothing, about certain things, from now on....which i don't like.
i went to the mall today, more or less against my will.
i got new runners, so that was good.
then i got some type of shirt-dress thing, it's hot but we'll see how slutty it looks in an outfit..i may have to adjust.
and then i got new shoes.
awesome shoes, that i will hopefully test drive next friday (without incident if all goes well).
tomorrow will be more applying, i hope someone will phone me for frig sakes.

this has been an odd day.

it's the first night i haven't really done anything, in about a week and a half.
not that i've been super retarded busy, but i've been doing out and doing stuff with people, or i've been going outside and haven't been sitting around.
right now i'm sitting around.
i feel weird when i sit around.
something is missing and i don't know exactly what.
i reeally hope i get some form of employment soon because i need to feel like i have some sort of purpose right now.

mini class!

so if i get into any nursing (which i don't know if i am or not yet), i need cpr/first aid.
i also just looked on most job postings on the health region site, and you also need them (mostly).
that puts a small damper on my job hunt (as of today and tomorrow) because i don't have them yet.
i'm wanting to apply both in health care areas and just bars/restaurants, cause i figure either way i'll get something i need - either experience, or loads of paper.
anyhizzle, i just signed up for a mid-week course that i need for cpr/first aid, and i'm pretty excited.
plus it's good that it will be useful for jobs and school.
i mean, it's stinking expensive, it's gonna suck to have to go to a class for 2 whole days straight, but i'm actually pumped.
i love doing "gross" first aid things.
hopefully it's not just full of old farts, cause it's in a community center that is usually full of the elderly.

gaah!

i need a job asap.
i just did the lame proserve thing online, i think i should have just skipped reading anything and taken the test.
tomorrow and the next day i should go apply, i need to work somewhere new.
all i wanna do is go out now, this friday i went out with some girls to a bar i haven't been to before...it was just a great time all around, and i think i need to be going there more frequently.
except at one point some drunk older lady whipped her boob out, so that was weird lol.
this going out leads to me needing money, and consequently me needing a job.
plus i need to save for school.
i don't know why, but i'm kind of nervous to even look.
mostly because i know lots of people that couldn't get one in the first place this summer, and i just never bothered looking since i was gone so long.
i've never once had a problem finding a job, which is awesome, so hopefully that keeps up.
hopefully i end up working with cool people.

it's time.

obviously i've deleted all of my last posts.
i need to start it over, move forward and just stop dwelling on stuff.
updates?
i came back from thailand 2 weeks ago, and it was by far the most awesome experience of my life.
the culture there is so different, so many little things we're used to and take for granted (like toilet paper) weren't there.
we helped get/prepare food, feed and bathe rescued elephants who had all been severely abused, and it was really awesome.
elephant nature park is a great foundation, and if you don't know about it then look it up.
we lived in a hill tribe for 4 days, that was really cool, but very dirty, smelly, and there wasn't much of anything there.....it was pretty ghetto.
we then did lots of cool things for 2 weeks, snorkeled/scuba/kayaking/climbing/trekking up mountains/visiting temples.
amanda got dengue fever so we had to spend a couple extra days in chiang mai for her blood tests, but it was good because we didn't miss much.
being there just made me realize how fortunate we are over here, they don't even have clean tap water.

as of now i've been applying for school and things...nursing in edmonton.
i really hope i get in, but it'll be weird not knowing many people over there.
i've been going out and visiting my old friends, meeting new people and just trying to move forward.
most of the time, i'm not really sure what i'm doing.