call me alice.

friday night:
kegger, link, old boy, incoherent, confused.
awkward? maybe.
new girl, hilarious times, sweet people.
no hangover.

saturday night:
house party, raphael, even older boy.
depressed, crying, bearded dragons, numbers exchanged.
hugs, kisses, tide and blacklights, good friends, snuggles.
no cabs, rude work boy, passed out.
sweaty sheets from being sardines, cell phones at 7am.

sunday:
work early, 4 hour naps, green tea, harry potter.
phone calls, plans made, follow through? let's wait and see.

life:
more drama than a teenage girl.
hard decisions, time is short.
what the fuck.
there are so many ups and downs right now.
i wish i could say i was just hormonal, but i'm not.
i have no idea what i want, and i thought i did for the longest time.
i feel i am falling down the rabbit hole.
what do i do, and when will i know?
how do i know?
every waking second is full of uncertainty.
every so often i get a glimpse of being content but it fades quickly.
if things are so unsure, maybe this is where i am not supposed to be.
i need things to fall in place.
i know they will, but it would be lovely if things would hurry up already.
i need to be where i need to be in life.
am i where i'm supposed to be, or am i someplace else?